Ahhh this is some true wisdom. I can relate SO much to this, even in platonic relationships the ways I brush off needs to appear less needy and thus making myself available to a host of unavailable people. How fucking exhausting. I’m going to be thinking about this one for a minute.
It's so hard to re-learn how to walk through any kind of relationship when we've associated self abandonment with being more loving toward the other person.
Dating as a fully-formed adult, with life behind you as well as ahead, is a sh!itshow, IMO. You know what you want, what you're willing to give, what boundaries you have, how to respect others' boundaries, how to be a good partner, so that should simplify things, right?! Not so much. Dating apps are window shopping and the "love stories" that come out of them are unicorns (bless 'em). Love that you're at a bar, alone, on a Friday night, creating. Happy to have found your 'stack. xo
Happy to have you here! Totally agree. I was thinking the other day that my success rate would like be the same or better if I just wandered the aisles of Lowes and made eye contact with everyone lol
I am one of the few people I know that did find my husband on Match.com back in 2011 before I even had a smart phone (when we met I literally had the phone that had the mini keyboard so you could text easier after having a standard flip phone in college). My sister met her husband at karaoke in 2011.
Love it, Laura. I know a wonderful couple who met on OK Cupid (or was it Plenty of Fish?) and they have been together for ages, happily married now. Love will find you when it finds you. I met my last boyfriend at a memorial service. I found two at karaoke in the early aughts. LOL. xo
Yes!!! I feel as though with social media and the way dating is these days, that people are flaky. In the meantime, I also deleted all apps. I'm so over it. If you're down for an amazing podcast, check out "Deja Blu" on YouTube. I've been listening to the one about sexual energy. Healing myself as a woman. And most of all loving myself well and truly, man or no man
Orrrrr another option- sparks that begin from a friendship that you start to see in a different way? :) Always a possibility! Just mentioning that cause it sounds like you need (deserve!!) a partner who’s also a great friend❤️ Also, I loved your quote about not abandoning yourself. I had to reread that a few times, cause it was so good and I wanted it to really stick and sink in.
That is the DREAM, but I think I'll have to make some new friends first. Yeah, more than anything, I want them to be a true partner, and I want them to be just as excited for me as I am for them. A solid friendship is a must.
Yes. You absolutely deserve all of you...! Oh...and are you somehow writing this in conjunction with my latest recently past love interest...? It's like you two know each other or something haha...
This is priceless! I can relate so much. The story of my life but like you I am learning and choosing to put myself first. Less anger and resentment, too. Thank you so much for sharing!
Ahhh this is some true wisdom. I can relate SO much to this, even in platonic relationships the ways I brush off needs to appear less needy and thus making myself available to a host of unavailable people. How fucking exhausting. I’m going to be thinking about this one for a minute.
It's so hard to re-learn how to walk through any kind of relationship when we've associated self abandonment with being more loving toward the other person.
Dating as a fully-formed adult, with life behind you as well as ahead, is a sh!itshow, IMO. You know what you want, what you're willing to give, what boundaries you have, how to respect others' boundaries, how to be a good partner, so that should simplify things, right?! Not so much. Dating apps are window shopping and the "love stories" that come out of them are unicorns (bless 'em). Love that you're at a bar, alone, on a Friday night, creating. Happy to have found your 'stack. xo
Happy to have you here! Totally agree. I was thinking the other day that my success rate would like be the same or better if I just wandered the aisles of Lowes and made eye contact with everyone lol
LOL. Better. Definitely. xo
I am one of the few people I know that did find my husband on Match.com back in 2011 before I even had a smart phone (when we met I literally had the phone that had the mini keyboard so you could text easier after having a standard flip phone in college). My sister met her husband at karaoke in 2011.
Love it, Laura. I know a wonderful couple who met on OK Cupid (or was it Plenty of Fish?) and they have been together for ages, happily married now. Love will find you when it finds you. I met my last boyfriend at a memorial service. I found two at karaoke in the early aughts. LOL. xo
Yes!!! I feel as though with social media and the way dating is these days, that people are flaky. In the meantime, I also deleted all apps. I'm so over it. If you're down for an amazing podcast, check out "Deja Blu" on YouTube. I've been listening to the one about sexual energy. Healing myself as a woman. And most of all loving myself well and truly, man or no man
Oooh, I love this rec. Thank you!
Orrrrr another option- sparks that begin from a friendship that you start to see in a different way? :) Always a possibility! Just mentioning that cause it sounds like you need (deserve!!) a partner who’s also a great friend❤️ Also, I loved your quote about not abandoning yourself. I had to reread that a few times, cause it was so good and I wanted it to really stick and sink in.
That is the DREAM, but I think I'll have to make some new friends first. Yeah, more than anything, I want them to be a true partner, and I want them to be just as excited for me as I am for them. A solid friendship is a must.
Yes. You absolutely deserve all of you...! Oh...and are you somehow writing this in conjunction with my latest recently past love interest...? It's like you two know each other or something haha...
HA! I wish emotionally unavailable people were that rare.
This is priceless! I can relate so much. The story of my life but like you I am learning and choosing to put myself first. Less anger and resentment, too. Thank you so much for sharing!